Friday, November 10, 2006

Blame it on Japan (yeah, yeah)


This story made me come out of robot-defender retirement (let's face it, no one was paying any attention anyway; I'm looking you're way South Korea).

That "cute" creature to the right (the one without glasses) is ready to eat you dead. The "smart" Japanese people decided to teach a robot to taste things so that it could sample wines and suggest food that would compliment them. Great idea . . . except when it tasted human flesh it identified it as . . . bacon.

So we're pretty much screwed at this point. Walk through this with me: 1)Bacon is the best food ever, 2)to robots, people taste like bacon, 3)to robots, people are the best food ever, 4)we all gonna die.

Our only hope is to convert all the robots to Judaism and get them to be Kosher. Any Rabbis want to take up the cause?

14 comments:

Tim Lewis said...

I hope you've got killer robot insurance.

everyday.wonder said...

I tried, I really really tried, to explain to Melissa why this was a hilarious post. She didn't get it.

Tonight, while she is "sleeping", I'm going to look for an ethernet cord connected to her ear downloading all the human secrets she gathers during the day. Unless she's one of those wireless models.

In which case I'm toast. If you get this message, send a Rabbi to the house immediately!

PapaPeters said...

Hmmm I'm not sure the robots have it wrong here. I like the taste of my own blood if I taste like bacon maybe I'll roast up my little toes. It's not that important right?

RoniZee said...

Where did they get the human flesh to feed this robot?, that's what I want to know.

Josh Kellar said...

Did they say which wine would taste best, or does that depend on the body part?

Meg said...

did they serve the robot fava beans as well?

arwen? said...

i was watching some show last week and they had all these robots... or maybe it was in Time... yes. It was Time. There were nurse robots. There were army robots. There was even a robot made by a guy to look EXACTLY like him... you really couldn't tell a difference. And then... You won't belive this one: there was a bionic woman on Oprah. Her arm moved whenever she willed it so and it was a robot arm!

The end is near, my friend...

James Wood said...

I'm looking forward to the robo-oprah-nurse-twin. That would rock.

Just so you know, if you have questions about what they fed to the robot you could . . . click on the link and read the article . . . I'm just saying.

Meg said...

But reading the article would be too easy, and make too much sense. It's more fun to ask silly questions! :P

rebecca marie said...

this is unrelated... but i just wanted to tell you that you are awesome. i know you aren't supposed to let your left hand know what your right hand is doing... but i found out anyway.

thanks for being like jesus.

PapaPeters said...

Um James you chose the wrong sex but after much deliberation you are the champion come see what you won.

Matt said...

Noooooo!

I am not sure which is scarier - that the Robot will think I am yummy, because by the way James you are dead on in saying Bacon is the yummiest food on the planet, or that they have people feeding robots human flesh. And I was worried about the NORTH Koreans!

Niki said...

James... this comment doesn't have anything to do with robots, but I just posted an article on my website that I thought you might be interested in. I heard that you were interested in church planting in NW portland? I attend a church in the Pearl District... it's pretty rad. There's a link to it in the post as well.

emilykaypeters said...

Hey, congrats on being the closest on weight and size... even though the sex wasn't right.. you were so much closer than I or Ryan was...